Which is better?

The apostle Paul told the Corinthians in no uncertain terms not to focus on their rights and to stop taking their fellow church members to court. "Wouldn't it be better to be defrauded?", Paul said, rather than focus on protecting yourself?

There are people like the Corinthians in every generation who are so concerned about self-protection that they will do whatever is necessary to avoid giving up their rights to autonomy and privacy for somebody else's sake, even to the point of hurting them if need be. They'll avoid at all costs being taken advantage of, or being put out, or risking hurt, even if it's for the welfare of another.

I understand this. I love privacy, autonomy, having things on my terms, being in charge, in control. But there's a line I won't cross to have that.

On the other hand, there are other people who are willing to suffer, to take hurt upon themselves, in order to keep someone else from harm, and to do them good.

I don't really understand that very well. But I also know when and in what circumstances that becomes the only right thing to do - let yourself be hurt for their sake. When you're committed to them - it's what you do.



Who would you rather be?

To be genuine and open-hearted, but a complete naif and total fool,

or...

To be duplicitous and guarded, but never get taken advantage of?



And which is better:

To give freely of yourself, believe the best of others, but wind up being defrauded?

or...

To hold yourself back, not risk exposing yourself to hurt, and so be solidly in control?



Which is better:

To love with your whole heart, lay yourself completely open, and wind up being cut deep and wide?

or...

To love only until it gets costly, keep enough secrets to guard your heart, and never really risk being open at all?



Which is better?

To vow to never hurt someone, give until you have nothing left, and then wind up being taken for granted?

or...

To do what's in your best interests, and hide what you must, to avoid wounding deeply those who love you?



Which is better?



I love independence, but..

As for me, I would rather be a total fool, be taken advantage of, be defrauded, be in the control of others, be cut deep and wide, be taken for granted, be abused and wounded, be seen as weak, but ... be trustworthy.

Or would you rather be seen by others as essentially closed to them, revealing only what you choose, independent, nobody's fool, worldly-wise, cynical, self-interested, but ... be able to stay safe from hurt and criticism?

Tough choice.

But if I had to choose between being the loyal dog who craves a kind touch, and being the master who one day pets and another day kicks the dog... I'd rather be the simple-minded dog. At least his heart is genuine. You never question a dog's sincerity. He just keeps coming back for more of the same - he loves unreservedly.