Actions Speak

louder than words, so the saying goes. I'm more convinced of that than ever.

Words can be beautiful things, and they can do much to heal. But they can do the opposite as well. As an example, if words you were counting on to be true, and were even assured to be true, prove later to be deceptive... it changes everything about your view of the person or organization that told them to you, and the impact from being lied to doesn't go away easily.

Even if your respect for the organization or your love for the person is stronger than the hurt, and you remain committed to them, you now view everything they say to you as unreliable.

What you look at from then on... is their actions. No wonder there's so many sayings on it - talk is cheap; easy to say, hard to do; I'll believe it when I see it, etc., etc. People and companies break trust, or build it up falsely in the first place.

Maybe this is what James had in mind when he said that "the tongue is a fire" and "no man can tame the tongue" and then goes on to list all the damage it can do, and how inconsistently we use what we say for both good and bad purposes. Except how is a person to know which use it's being put to, when someone's talking or writing to you? How can you tell?

Actions. Watch their actions. See if they match the words. Like Reagan's famous line about his approach to the Soviets: "trust, but verify". And if the verify part doesn't line up with the words part... then wait for their actions to line up, before you count on anything from them, before you take anything they say at face value again.

Maybe that's also what James meant when he said "what does it profit, brothers, if someone *says* he has faith, but does not have works?", and "I will show you my faith *by* my works". James knew how people are willing to lie to create a certain impression, or to avoid creating one, (like looking bad in the eyes of someone who matters to them.) So instead of lying about it, he wants instead that our actions actually line up with our words. To him, yes you trust a person's profession of faith (or love, or honesty), sure, but you *verify* it by their works (their actions.)

A person's actions really are the best indicator of what's in their heart. They may say all kinds of things about what they'd like to do with you, or want for you, or feel about you, but what they actually *do* for you is what shows you the truth.

Actions usually cost you something in terms of time or money (or quasi-money like vacation days or career building) or image or reputation or embarrassment or privacy or inconvenience. How do you know what you're worth to someone? By what they're really willing to spend of themselves on you. Exactly how much they value you will show - in their actions.

So here's a new "old saying", then (in rhyme of course):

Let them say what they may;
What they do tells what's true.

And for someone like me, who uses words a lot.. That means there's a lot of ground to cover; it can get very costly to have your actions match all those words. No wonder Solomon said "the more words, the more grief." I should pay attention and say less, so that when I say something.. it's true.