Saturday, May 30, 2009

It's a gift

On the night of my last HS502 class, a friend of mine there was looking kind of beaten down. We talked a bit before class, and yes - overworked, tired, disillusioned, unsure of why she was even there. She said "I have no relationship with God left. I don't know why I'm here or what I should be doing."

My instant reply was this: sometimes a sense of duty is all you've got to keep you going. And sometimes, that's enough to see you through.  Often God is not so much concerned with our being happy as with our doing what's right.  Doing what's right, even when we're not happy about it, is evidence of faith.

Then I asked her to remember Jesus' story of the two sons and the vineyard? The Dad said to each: "go and work in the vineyard." One kid fussed and whined and refused. But later he went and worked. The other said, "Sure, Dad. Happy to." But he never went. Jesus asked: "which son did the will of his father?" Answer: the one who went (even with his bad attitude.) Jesus said: "go and do likewise."

I'm not sure it was something she could hear at the time. So later I wrote on her Facebook page:

"I've learned that joy is a gift, not an entitlement or a discipline or a character trait. It's something God gives, and when it comes it's always a delight, in part because it's a surprise -
 an unexpectedly happy one.

So if you can't act out of joy, then act out of duty till the joy returns. Do the work of your Father. That places you on the path where you know joy walks, so when it comes looking... it can find you. 
And it will."




And the point to this whole story, I guess, is: physician, heal thyself. :) I'm actually amazed that I could say all this to someone else as counsel, and with such conviction, given where I've been.

It's almost like I've learned a lesson somewhere along the way.

Maybe so.

1 comment:

Future Urban Planner said...

Experience is still the hardest teacher, as she/it gives the lesson first and the answers later.

I have 3 s's- that I've shared with D1- who I think passed it on to you too-
God is sovereign,
God wants to sanctify us
and He WILL sustain us.

As has been observed many a time before, we here in America, are not that comfortable with anyone having an absolute say over our destiny, ecept ourselves. If we are honest with ourselves, we aren't all that comfortable even with God having the final say.

But if we truly want to call ourselves Christians, we do have to submit all of our life to God, just as Jesus did- for He never asks us to do anything He didn't do himself.

But when God is reigning sovereign over us, a truly mind (and lifestyle) altering concept, He will sanctify us- He will consecrate us, set us apart. So even when we feel alone and despairing, He is holding onto us, keeping us in His everstrong embrace that is unshakable, the only spot that one can truly know peace, which brings me to my next point. You know me, gotta be in sets of 3 (I'm not that OCD! Just undiagnosed- haha!)

Growing up in the church I heard a lot of "Christianese," a lot of words, that due to their repetition just washed over me, without giving me much pause to consider what the true definition of the words mean. But these past few years the word "sustain" has truly hit home.

I know that from the past, God has led me through dark valleys, He has SUSTAINED me, He has kept His presence. Sometimes it felt like I was screaming at the Heavens and being met with silence, but that doesn't mean that God wasn't there.

Sometimes He wanted me to demonstrate my complete and utter dependence on Him, and through that there came forth growth. While in the middle of it, it didn't feel like growth, it felt like He was silent and didn't care. But on the other side I realized that He continued to sustain me, He did not fail.

It is a matter of going through, and not quitting, to persevere (a cyclical (e)motion) so that you can see what will happen, not just what is happening.

When one is in the deepest pits of despair, as one knows from experience, one doesn't really want to hear cold theology, but the fact that God is sovereign and that He wants to sanctify us, I have found, go hand in hand with the unshakable fact that He will sustain us. Always. He has promised us this.

I do totally agree that joy is not an entitlement. We here in America think it is, but tell that to some one in Somalia or Cambodia and they will probably wonder if you'll give them a million dollars after that.

As E once wisely observed, "life is short, but it is wide. This too shall pass." Joy always comes in the morning. Hold onto our Father, who despite whatever the devl wants us to believe, has NEVER and Will Never loosen His grip on us.

Grace & peace always.

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