Just one more post..

on the subject of the marginalized among us.

Hey! I'm writing my first paper for TS502 on this book, and .. it's on my mind, okay? :) Plus.. I have some personal application to make, which is what I do here, right? It's theraputic..

Anyway, I thought this was a perceptive series of quotes by the author (Virgilio Elizondo) of Galilean Journey: The Mexican-American Promise. And while it's not entirely original thought by any means, it was well-worded enough to strike a chord in me. The context is a discussion of poverty as a marginalizing influence. He goes on to define poverty in three ways:


"For our purposes, we may distinguish three basic types of poverty: material, psychological, and cultural-spiritual. Material poverty is the lack of the fundamental necessities of life, such as food, clothing, housing, and medicine. It means not having money or credit. It means not having a job or even the possibility of one. It means being broke."

"Everyone has basic psychological needs, and when these are not met there is psychological poverty. Everyone needs to be accepted, esteemed, needed, understood, desired, and loved. If these are not met, persons develop a low self-image and will often fear or even hate themselves. One of the great problems in the world is that because of psychological poverty many persons do not love or accept themselves as they are."

"A person could be materially rich while being psychologically poor, and vice versa."

"The third and deepest level of poverty is cultural-spiritual poverty. Cultural and spiritual are not the same, but they are intimately related, for basic culture is in many ways the fundamentally life-spirit of the group. Cultural-spiritual poverty is the deprivation ... of the very humanity of a racially and culturally determined group."

"This is the worst type of poverty because it deprives persons of their fundamental humanity as shaped and determined by the Creator. Persons are conditioned to see beauty, acceptability, and respectability only in the ways of the power groups and often feel ashamed or at least confused about their own characteristics. Some even curse their own people and their God for making them to be what they are. Their fundamental spirit is ridiculed, stepped on, and crushed."



Okay.. why am I bringing this up? In part because it was a new way of looking at poverty for me, and especially helps me understand Jesus' stated concern, in the Sermon on the Mount, for the poor "in spirit." I think I might know now what that means.

The other part of why I bring this up is because, while I haven't experienced cultural-spiritual poverty as he defines it (since I'm a white male in North America, after all..), and have only twice in my life experienced anything like material poverty (and that not for very long), I *have* experienced the middle one - psychological poverty. And to a great degree I still live in it - every day. You could say that I shouldn't (many people have..), but the feelings are real and, some days, overwhelming. Let me repeat what he said:

"Everyone needs to be accepted, esteemed, needed, understood, desired, and loved. If these are not met, persons develop a low self-image and will often fear or even hate themselves."

Yes. That's it. Rings true to my experience, and it's one of two core topics (the other being effectively dealing with loss - which itself is all tied up with the above, since my losses are all in the area of these unmet needs) that Dr. S-W and I are talking about, weekly now (yesterday, in fact.) He says that this fits with all I've told him, and he also thinks I'm doing well with it all. Ha - I'm glad *he* thinks so. He must get some personal affirmation and career validation from that. ;)

Now, where was I?

Oh yeah. Elizondo goes on to say this:


"For those who ordinarily have a good existential sense of belonging, the idea of being chosen is nothing special. But for one who has been consistently ignored or rejected, the fact of being noticed, accepted, and chosen is not only good news, but new life. For in being chosen, what was nothing becomes something; what was dead now comes to life. ... The experience of being wanted as one is, of being needed and of being chosen, is a real and profound rebirth. Those who had been made to consider themselves inferior, will now begin to appreciate what it feels like to be accepted fully as human beings."


Yup. That's it again. Except I would add one more word to the list of "noticed, accepted and chosen." I'd add.. understood. Or.. known. Because you can be noticed and accepted, and even chosen, but - if these things happen without you being known/understood.. there is a very real possibility that when you *are* fully known.. you will then be rejected. So.. to guard against that, you put on a mask, you play a role or a part that you think represents the reason you were noticed and accepted, so that you will *continue* to be chosen/wanted. But when you do that.. you become that much more alienated from the real you. You become: the roles you play.

Is this making sense? To me it is.

If they knew me.. really knew me as I really am.. would they still accept and choose (want) me?

With God.. I know the answer (which is why on a daily basis I have such an overwhelming sense of His grace.) With people.. I don't. Until.. I stop playing the part I think I've been assigned, stop covering up the real me, and take the risk of removing the mask, the risk of being known. Then, when they (be it family, friend, employer, social group) understand who I am, when they know me, their actions will tell me whether or not I'm still wanted. But sometimes.. it's too big of a risk for me to take - the threat of rejection (based on past patterns) is too great, and the consequences too severe. So I stay hidden.

Those times in my life when I *have* been noticed, accepted and chosen - all while being well known and understood well - have been few. But they have been life-giving. And some of them.. continue to give life even today.