time and silence

"I am silent. I know the depth of [your] affliction..."

"I have ever found time and silence the only medicine, and these but assuage, they never can suppress, the deep-drawn sigh which recollection for ever brings up, until recollection and life are extinguished altogether."



----- Thomas Jefferson, writing to John Adams

coping

.


when you face a change
that affects the whole of life
how do you adapt


.


There's a lot of talk of change these days. Political and societal change especially.

But I've been thinking about change on a personal level - life changes and how we adapt to them. I wonder if anyone has studied how people adapt to change, and articulated a process that helps?

I know they've done that for grief. You know, listed its stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance. I get those. I've lived them. Some I'm still not through with.

But is it the same thing for adapting to any unexpected change?

When life deals you a blow (like it did to the Biblical Job), maybe like

... a debilitating illness or injury
... someone you love no longer in your life
... a crippling financial or career reversal
... becoming a victim of violent crime

what do you do to cope with it? How do you adjust the whole of your life to deal with what happened?

Is it any different for positive change? Is there a general method, a process to follow?

Or is it all (like the Wiki article says)... just like grief?



Because that part I already know.

Meanings of words

Last week, the prof in BT501 drew on the board a little diagram to help explain how to think about the meaning of words. He said that exegetical fallacies often come from assuming that words have constant meaning across time and culture, that somehow the meaning is permanently tied to the letters written, the syllables spoken.

(a couple of easy examples clarify this: what idea did the word 'gay' convey 200 years ago vs today? what does the word 'solicitor' mean in England vs in the USA?)

He said that the letters written and syllables spoken are the SYMBOLS which represent the word. But SYMBOLS are helpless without mental activity, which is what's necessary to link a word to a CONCEPT.

If I say "chair", and you think about "chair", you have a picture in your head of a chair. That's the mental activity of attaching a CONCEPT to the SYMBOL.

Now, of course your picture of a chair will likely be different than mine. I may think of an Eames chair - you may think of a rocking chair or a recliner. To get us thinking about the same chair, we need a REFERENT, an external experience to which we can link the CONCEPT, and thus narrow it to a specific chair.

This takes the CONCEPT out of our heads and places it in reality - a reality that we can share, because we have a common REFERENT.

The triangle looks like this:

SYMBOL

(written, spoken)

/                                   \

/                                      \

/                                         \

/                  W O R D               \

/                                                \

/                                                   \

/                                                      \

REFERENT -------------------------- CONCEPT

(external experience)                             (mental activity)

Some people (like me) tend to live on the left side of the triangle, wanting to experience something to ascertain its real meaning, to connect that meaning to my senses in order to know it.

Others tend to live on the right side, perfectly content to think about things and let that be enough, with no real need to experience the thing to know it, nor any need to link their meaning to another's.

But when it comes to Biblical interpretation, the top of the triangle is where some people stop. Too bad.

I think that both fulness and balance in meaning comes from the tension between the REFERENT and the CONCEPT, between the experiential and the rational.  This is how we really come to know meaning.  We get out of our heads and go experience that which we know!  But we also think about the implications of that experience, and filter it.

The rational and the experiential.  Together.  Helping each other know things fully.  :)  Isn't that how it should be?

Diets and retreats

Does this statement seem counterintuitive to you?

"Give up these few things, and your life will be better. Yes, of course, you enjoy them... but really, you're better off without them."

I'm sure you've heard some variation on the theme, often from doctors or health experts.

First they tell you to 'stop smoking and drinking.' 

(Yeah, yeah, okay. I get that.) 

'No more red meat, either.' 

(Well, maybe. Vegetables are... fine.) 

'Now, knock off the caffeine.' 

(Hey! That's getting personal.) 

Then, all fatty foods. Then sweets. Then salt. Always taking more great tasting stuff away. And adding back in nasty stuff like tofu, and fiber, and wasabi or cayenne (if you really must have seasoning.) Eeesh.

(I know, I know, some of you actually like all that stuff. :) Now if they just made bacon-flavored tofu, I might get on board with that. And... there's always bacon salt. Had some on my green beans last night. mmmm... and it's vegetarian!)

"But you'll feel better and live longer", they say.

Well, maybe so, but who wants to live longer if the life you have left is so unenjoyable? It's like I've always said about running. Sure you live longer. But if you have to spend all those extra years running... yuk.

And yet - I do feel better by running. But I'm just not running daily. I'm running ENOUGH to get the benefits (roughly two 5Ks a week), without making it into a religion.

And yes, I've cut back on alcohol, sugar, etc., while still retaining some. And yes, I feel better. But I mean, is NONE really necessary?



Maybe you've heard this, from people who shill for health foods and dietary supplements:

"You can eat all the foods you enjoy... and STILL lose weight."
"In only 20 minutes a day..."
"With only one tablet twice a day..."
"Using our easy-to-prepare and delicious meals..."
(you fill in the phrase.)

Yeah, right.

Maybe they work, maybe they don't, but the theme of them all is roughly this: the medical experts would have you live a life that's so austere that there's no joy left in it! So how about something that allows you to still enjoy what you love, but... without the ill effects of overindulging?

It speaks, I guess, to the universal human need for enjoyment - and the exercising of preferences in that enjoyment! We like some things more than others. :) 

Plus, being a free moral agent, as humans are, implies choice.  We like choice. We don't like others making our choices for us. Advice and counsel.. sure, that's okay. Sometimes we need it.  But we still want to choose the course of action, and not be ordered or guilted into it.

Discipline is needed, of course. Problems definitely come from over-indulging, or from emphasizing one thing to the exclusion of others. The excesses of smoking, drinking, overeating & being sedentary are well documented and tragic. But to over-discipline oneself... doesn't that lead to problems, too?

Think of the female marathon runner who trains so hard that her body fat drops to a level where estrogen stops getting produced. If she wants to retain the ability to have children... will she be able to? Or what of the person whose over-disciplined approach to fasting and purging the body from toxins turns into death-spiral anorexia?

Or less extreme, instead of a low-carb diet... a NO carb diet (without the high-fiber good carbs). Or a NO fat diet (without the good omega-3 fatty acids). Or an ALL fiber diet instead of just a high fiber diet, a daily (!) colon cleansing, etc., etc. What might be a good corrective in moderation, is bad when taken to extreme.

If you're trying to correct an imbalance, you might swing to the other end temporarily, in order to break a habit (like I did last year during Lent with alcohol), but... permanently? Why?

I mean, even the "harmful" things have benefits. Think of the studies that have shown the benefits to your arteries from drinking red wine, or the helpful properties of antioxidants in chocolate and coffee...



So what does this all have to do with going on a retreat, you ask? (or maybe you don't ask, because you know that I'll tell you whether you ask or not!)

But first, a little break for some pictures from the place I stayed over the weekend. It was quiet, pretty, roomy, comfy, peaceful, cheap!


















Isn't that homey? :)



Well, I think going on a retreat like this is sort of like a visit to the doctor... except the doctor is you. Plus maybe the input from other sources you have at your disposal (books, prayer, others..) And you see in yourself things that need changing. Do more of this, less of that.

It isn't so much physical, as it is for the emotional/mental/spiritual health issues. (I'll call that E/M/S for short.) I had a doctor for these at one point - the therapist - but.. I'm self-diagnosing now. Mostly. Except when I'm not. :)

So, last weekend I found a number of things affecting the condition of my E/M/S health, some of which I'm still working on from before with the counselor dude, Dr. Shrink-wrap. On those things, I remind myself, as he did: "small steps are okay. small steps add up to real progress." :) I like small steps.

But in some other areas, the outside counsel in my ears was ringing: "it's time to cut this out. no more for you, boy. kick this - now.  if not now, when?  it's time." And my reaction is... come on! Stop with the NONE part, already. Must we go to that extreme?

My counselor always said that when I caught myself thinking and feeling things that were ... not healthy ... that it's better to not stuff the feelings, but to acknowledge them. Allow yourself to experience them - they're real, they're part of you. And then, let them pass, don't allow them to linger by dwelling on them. Get them out, let them go.

Then there are other E/M/S health areas, though, where the approach is different. These areas are ones which are natural responses to life (ex: hurt, disappointment) and normal desires for life (ex: affirmation, pleasure), but are only really a problem when over-emphasized, taken to excess.

Here, you don't eliminate them completely from your life, you just take steps to control your reactions, limit your exposure to things that in the past you have let become excessive.

This makes more sense to me than saying: "because you over-emphasized something (a thought pattern, an emotional reaction) in the past - you must now deny yourself anything in that regard. You must be ruthless and severe with yourself."

Pooh. Sounds like discipline at the expense of joy.

Don't get me wrong. I understand both "do!" and "do without", "give!" and "give up". Sometimes you do without in order to be able to do more... good for others. Sometimes you give up, to be able to have more... to give away. I know this.

I just don't want to do without, and give up, so much that... there's little joy left in the doing and the giving.

Balance in all things seems better to me. And if you need to swing in one direction for a while to correct an imbalance in another direction... you do it temporarily, then move back a little at a time, until you reach balance again. Keep the enjoyment, the things you love... but manage the amount, checking routinely for excess.

I like that better. I don't want to be grumpy and morose. :(

I want to be able to say "To Life! L' Chaim!", instead of
"Bah, Humbug!"

Don't you?

bedtime

.


leaves flutter to ground
like clothes from a lover's back
trees getting naked


grab that snow blanket
and take those pretty leaves off
almost time for bed


.

You Are The Best Thing

Baby
It’s been a long day, baby.
Things ain’t going my way
you know I need you here
here by my side
all of the time

And Baby, the way you move me its crazy.
it’s like, you see right through me,
You make it easier,
You please me and you don’t even have to try.

oh because,
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
ever happened to me

Baby,
We’ve come a long way, baby.
You know, I hope and I pray that you believe me
When I say this love will never fade away

oh because
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
ever happened to me

Now both of us have known love before,
To come on up promising, like the spring,
Then just walk on out the door.
Our hearts are kind and are hearts are strong.
well, let me tell you what exactly is on my mind.

you are the best thing
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
ever happened to me

you are the best thing
you are the best thing
you are the best thing
ever happened to me



----- Ray LaMontagne

Yeah. :)

Going back, to move forward

that's the definition of a retreat, isn't it?

A retreat is never for going backwards, and then staying there. That's... giving up. That's surrender.

Instead, it's "one step back, two steps forward", or "withdraw, only to re-engage".   It's like the coach pulling you out for a breather after a long stretch in the game, knowing that with a little regrouping, you can go back in and play, finish stronger.

In a retreat you step back a bit, rest/heal/restore, consolidate what you have, think about what you've learned, figure out your path, and then press forward again with renewed zeal.

Sure, you may have a need to fill up on nourishment, to bind up a few wounds (or have someone attend to them who knows how.)   But the whole intent is to press on again.

And so it is with my upcoming "personal retreat".  Step back a bit, think/dream/pray, refresh/restore/renew, move forward again.

And I did decide to switch venues for it - I'll save Thunder Bay for another time.  It'll still be there, thundering away.  ;)  I'm heading instead to a catholic retreat center on a lake.  It's fall, it's crisp & cool out...  a nice time to walk through the leaves, see the glistening still water, and... climb the stairs to the second floor unit later for some much needed warmth and refreshment.  :)

Well, I'm off.  See you in a few.

beautiful, unanswerable questions

(and I have a few...)

:)

Carl Sandburg put it like this:

Under the summer roses

When the flagrant crimson

Lurks in the dusk

Of the wild red leaves,

Love, with little hands, 

Comes and touches you

With a thousand memories,

And asks you

Beautiful, unanswerable questions.

Language, again

Ran yesterday, on this "bad knee".  Ran the whole intended 5K distance, too, at a normal pace, and I was soooo glad!  :)   

I was really worried that this "injury" would sideline me from this new-ish activity of mine that I used to hate with a passion but have come to tolerate for the benefits it brings.

Gosh, I was even *happy* to run yesterday!  How weird is that?  

I could see myself dealing with knee problems for the rest of my life, like some broken-down athlete, and am so relieved that, despite some discomfort in the beginning (and some afterwards, too), that I could push through to a good long stretch of no pain while running.  Yay!

I mean... how am I ever going to run in the Twin Cities Marathon next Fall if my knee won't cooperate?  ;)  

(don't laugh!  they give you 6 hours... that's 13:44/mile.)

Okay, shifting gears from exercising the body to exercising the mind.

Phonemes, morphemes, syntax, semantics...

These are the fundamentals of linguistics (the study of language.)  Apparently.

And they go together like this:  babies use phonemes (verbal sound units), young children combine them into morphemes (word units.)  For adults the morphemes are then ordered via syntax, in order to establish the sophisticated semantics necessary for clear meaning.

Now understand, this is all taken from 10 minutes of a single on-line summary lecture from a course on Hermeneutics (the study of interpretation of language), so it is by necessity simplistic.  

But I never expected to even be exposed to linguistics at all when I signed up for Seminary.   It's kind of comical.  :)  Well, I guess you had to be there to see the humor (or maybe... the irony.) 

Even weirder... Bethel is creating a new Linguistics major.  Why, I can't imagine.  There are certainly other good colleges around here that have one.  

I suppose, though, that they may want to provide such a major in a "distinctively Christian environment."  That's a rationale for a lot of what happens in religiously-affiliated schools, whether evangelical, lutheran, or catholic.   

It goes: the world finds XYZ useful.  But it's so secular, we need a version of XYZ that's... "ours", suitable for "our people".  

Personally, I think that leads to isolation, but... who am I to say?   

I think it would be better for religiously-motivated kids to "infiltrate" a secular school, and learn how to live out their faith in a sometimes antagonistic environment, than to be sheltered from it.  

So far, at least, I am perfectly able to take some secular research about language and the interpretation of it, and apply it directly in the world of theology and biblical studies.  I would imagine that the reverse is also possible.  

Maybe when I'm done with all this and am out there teaching... I'll be able to report on that first hand.  :)  I wouldn't mind teaching biblical studies at a secular school.  Might be more fun that way!

And speaking of applying language in a religious setting, tonight I am one of seven lectors helping lead a prayer service at St. Rose's.  We are working through the "Prayer for the Common Good", with a special focus on the upcoming general elections.  God knows... we need divine guidance in that voting booth.  I sure do, anyway.  I haven't been this torn about a political choice in years.

Would you like a flu shot with that ballot? (updated)

Have you heard about this early voting thing?

Yesterday in Chicago I was sitting in the hotel room, nursing my sore knee (the hauling of furniture/boxes/mattresses up and down stairs got to it...) and I read about early voting in the local newspaper.

So, I now see that they have it in Illinois, and I know I've seen reference to early voting in Wisconsin. But in my state? I'm not sure. Never thought to check.

What's the purpose of it, anyway? Absentee voting I get. You're going to be out of town and can't get to the polling place, so you go get an absentee ballot and handle it by mail. Sure.

But that's not this. This is just like... the regular voting booth thing, I think. Except... not on election day.

Why?

Is it for people who just don't like crowds? Is it for poll workers to practice, like they do at a "soft opening" of a retail store? I mean, why set up voting machines for some short period only a couple of weeks prior to the election?

If you're going to do this, why not have continuous voting all year, from the Iowa primaries on? Or at least from the conventions on. Or... why not do it all over the internet? I'm not sure I get it. Or like it.

The thing that really rattled me was: they have mobile locations to vote! Like some kind of van pulls up or something, and you go on it and "do the deed." The newspaper had a list of mobile locations and... they were in Jewel/Osco parking lots, for Pete's sake! You must be kidding! Do your weekly grocery shopping and vote, too?

Well, this got me thinking about other things that are mobile. I know they have mobile:

> libraries
> MRI scans
> blood pressure screenings
> flu shots
> dog grooming
> license renewal

so, in an ideal mobile world, you could check out a book, get your blood pressure tested, scan your sore knee (which is on my mind right now..), buy your deer hunting license, get a flu shot, have Spot washed and clipped, and... cast your vote for the next President of the United States of America... all at the same time.

I mean, what's next?  Drive-through voting???

Something about this seems wrong.

Voting is a community event, doggone it! It's a public service ritual you engage in with your neighbors a few times a year. It's a community gathering where all are welcome, not just your friends but people of all stripes, as long as they live nearby.

Seems to me that there aren't many of those kinds of opportunities left. Besides the usual community "Krazy Daze" in the local park every summer, or the occasional church festival, what else is there that brings neighbors together?

Do neighborhoods have block parties anymore? (yeah, ours did this year - for the first time in memory, though, and some of the attendees have lived there 40 years)

I think voting should be an occasion for a party! We should tailgate! :D

Everybody can meet in the parking lot at the polling places, and we could grill out, cook brats for the poll workers, bring them a beer when their shift is over. A local furniture store sets up a big screen TV like a Jumbotron, and we all sit there after the polls close and watch the returns come in. :) This could be fun! (and maybe a little wild...)

But still, there's something so community-minded about you and your neighbors all rubbing shoulders at the polling place doing your civic duty - together.

Early voting? Hmpf. I'll go on the day.

With my neighbors.

Speedy delivery

well maybe not so speedy, but delivery anyway.

J2 is in an apartment now, since withdrawing from school 10/1 to sort things out for a while, and has been sleeping on a mattress "rescued" from behind a hotel. Um... the best I can say about it is that he and his new roomie (F) kicked it real well first to be sure nothing was living inside it.

Ewww. (shudder)

Furniture in the place is, shall we say, sparse? So, after work today we pile as much into the Jeep Liberty as we can stuff (dresser, chair, boxes of dishes), and head down south with supplies.

Then tomorrow a run to the local mattress store. No headboard, though, just frames. This is spartan first-apartment living (for two males, besides), so he can just make do like everybody else does when they turn 21 and make their own decisions.

(like calling home and saying: "Hey, Dad, I withdrew from school and signed a lease today!" Wait.. you WHAT??)

Suppose I can't complain. I signed my first lease without a cosigner at 19, and didn't finish my Bachelors for another 9 years. :) So, um.. never mind, son. Excuse the outburst. ;)

Okay, so after that, a trip to Goodwill for a 3 piece living room set he's got his eye on. Mmmm.. I'll bet it's really choice.

Maybe around Thanksgiving time more of his stuff can make its way south, and more again at Christmas. Eventually he'll be well stocked. At this point it looks like the job he got in retail may keep him there over the holidays, so... he may wind up playing host to us.

THAT should be interesting. :) We... may eat out.

Back to back concerts (on a bad leg)

Woah.  Out late two nights running.  This is a lot for an old guy.  :)

Ha, yeah -

if it wasn't for this darned knee, I'd still be out with the college/post-college/grad school crowd, I think.

(Hm.  Is there a demographic category that sweeps all that in?)

Last time I was in KC, I banged my kneecap against a door (the leading edge part) and ow ow ow ow!  It hurt!  Didn't think it would amount to more than a bruise, though, until a suspicious clicking noise and pulling sensation began occurring when I walked (not while running, though... felt fine then.  Weird.)

Then on Sunday, while opening the car door to head out to Stereolab at First Avenue, something in the knee went "pop!" and THEN it got sore, and weak.  So, off to the Doctor the next business day.  

X-rays: nothing.  

So he says "Naproxen Sodium - ice - brace - two weeks.  After that... an MRI.  We may have to clean something out..."  

Ick.

No kneeling on hard surfaces, avoid deep knee bends, etc.  But he said I can run on it.  Okaaaay.  If you say so.  So I try that yesterday.  

Um, nope.  :(  Two laps in, and ... I can feel it pulling behind the kneecap.  Better stop, I guess.  I'll give it until Friday and try again.

Ironically, it's Workers Compensation, since I got hurt at work initially.  :(  WC just happens to be what I work on for a living, only... not from the side of the injured worker.  What I do is predict outcomes, price the product, etc.

So anyway, with slowly swelling knee, I still manage to get there early, grab a barstool, find a perch with a foot rail, and... settle in for a little Stereolab with my Miller Lite (w/ Rose's lime) and veggie curry tofu hotdish.  :)  (Um, never mind; it's a long story.)

Quite a good opening act: Le Loup.  A talented guy working a looper, but with a full band behind him, too.  Great sound.  The CD available on iTunes, though.. was before his band, and is not the same.  

The middle act, Monade, is a spin off of Stereolab, with some different personnel, and was dull, dull, dull.  Too bad.  But when the headliners came up, the place came alive!  They were really good.  :)  

While the opener was on, though, I turned my barstool over temporarily to the girl standing next to me, who was more than happy to guard my seat with her seat ;) for a few minutes, while I limped downstairs to the merch table.  The bass player from Stereolab was there, and had that great British accent.  Goes well with the lead singer's frequent use of French lyrics.  Cosmopolitan.  Oooh.

They did a bunch of songs from their new album (to be reviewed here soon), and it's the same great retro-60's beats and organ as always, like Diana Ross back in the day, mingled with electonica and French pop.  I love it!  :)  Good stuff.

Eventually I waddle (not weave!) down 7th to the parking garage and drag in sometime after midnight.  6AM came early Monday morning.  Ooof.  

Then, a day of pain and pills and ice, gearing up for another concert Monday night.  



Thankfully this place has lots of tables and seating.  Great venue.
 

Dinner first, though, with buddy SQ, plus roomie and his gf.  Philly cheese steak and 2-4-1 Miller Lites.  Real.  Good.  Food.

More people showed up later, namely K who skipped out on night classes (naughty!), and a new guy to me, J30 (roughly his age), an old friend of SQs from college.  Nice guy, easy to like.

This time the opening act was... eh.  An Aussie singer/songwriter named Whitley who was funny in a droll way, and talented enough, just... kind of mixed on his material.  Or maybe it was my knee.  Ow.

But later, after everybody who was coming actually came, and the headliner (Ben Kweller) took the stage, things got way better.  Way.

SQ had lent me 3 of his CDs to prep me for the show, and I liked some of it alright.  But live... wow.  Was he good!  Young guy, mid-20s, whose style is shifting from alternative to country.  And it's a great shift.  He has such a feel for country music.  

His band was tremendous, too - Kweller on acoustic (and sometimes piano), bass player and drummer who did perfect country harmonies, and a pedal steel player who almost stole the show.   Wowowow.  He has a new CD set to come out in January, and if it's going in this direction... he's got grammy potential, or a CMA award at least.  

Best show I've seen in a while.  And, with good company to boot.  :)

So who cares if I dragged in after midnight... again.  ;)  But last night I got to bed by 9.  I'm good, yeah, but not that good.

Music Reviews: KC Trip, Part 2

Okay, so here's the stuff from my KC trip that I *did* like.  ;)  And, it wraps up an old list of music I'd been gradually working my way through for over a year.  I'm all done now, but it's been a real journey of discovery into lots of different current music.  It's been... interesting.  And good.  :)

Gillian Welch - "Soul Journey":  Very folk-y.  :)  Not alt-country, though... more like neo-traditional.  Imagine Emmylou Harris trying to sound Dylanesque (and not quite making it.)  Does that help?  

Honestly, I'd pick Dolly Parton's "Little Sparrow" over this CD - they're not dissimilar.  Still, I had some favorites:  Make Me A Pallet On Your Floor, Lowlands, Look At Miss Ohio, No One Knows My Name, One Little Song, Wayside/Back in Time.

Idina Menzel - "Still I Can't Be Still":  On this first album of hers from 1998, before she hit it big on Rent and Wicked, she sounds a bit like Joss Stone.  Powerful voice, capable of great dynamics (you could see how she could make it on Broadway), just sort of... raw, undeveloped and unsure (despite the bravado of several songs.)  Favorites: Minuet, Planet Z, Straw Into Gold, Reach, Fool Out Of Me, All of the Above (except no girls are really *like* that - they just like to think so.)  ;)

Maritime - "We, The Vehicles":  Their sophomore effort, I thought the lead singer was feeling his way more here than in the first album, "The Glass Floor" (reviewed earlier.)  The lyrics... you wonder if they really have meaning, or are they just for verbal effect?  

He sings about "boys with directionless hair and languorous girls with undertaker makeup", and a "parade of punk-rock t-shirts".  He certainly can paint a picture with words.  Wonder if he gets his ideas from all the new books on the English language.   Anyway, I liked best: Calm, German Engineering, People The Vehicles, Protein and Poison, Tearing Up The Oxygen, Young Alumni.

Hot Hot Heat - "Elevator":  This is catchy pop on the order of Maroon 5, only.. dark in tone and lyric, and not as slick.  Peppy, but not bright in mood.  Pretty good, though.  I liked the title track, plus: Middle of Nowhere, Pickin' It Up, Jingle Jangle, Dirty Mouth, Running Out Of Time, Shame On You.

Kings Of Convenience - "Riot On An Empty Street":  Wow.   Wow.  :)  I heard "Homesick", and thought...  hey!  it's Simon & Garfunkel reincarnated.  (except, um... they're not dead yet.)  But it's that same acoustic guitar, those same Everly-Brothers-sing-folk-music harmonies, the same introspective, brooding, impressionistic lyrics.  

Plus, they get Feist to sing backup on "Know How" and "The Build Up".  How cool is that? Their big single off this CD is "I'd Rather Dance With You", but every track is great.  A winner! Two thumbs up - best of the trip, right here.  I need all the rest of their CDs now.  Public library... to the rescue!  :)

Music Reviews: KC Trip, part 1

Well, back to work.  :)  Business travel/vacation's all done.

Finally, here's about half of what I listened to two weeks ago while driving back and forth to KC.  The other half will follow shortly.  This set is mostly the stuff I didn't like so much.  The better half will follow tomorrow.

Looper - "The Geometrid":  The best thing I can think of to describe this is: a poor man's Moby.  They do similar stuff, but not as smooth, not as catchy, vocal samples not as sharp, and a lot more annoying squeakage.  These made the cut, mostly because of the quality of the vocals: Money Hair, On The Flipside, These Things, Tomorrow's World.  

Jets to Brazil - "Orange Rhyming Dictionary":  iTunes calls this CD gloomy, but in a good sort of way.  Oh?  I think it's just plain gloomy.  Post-punk grunge rock is what I'd call it, and since when can that be anything but gloomy, really?  Dark lyrics, minor keys, ragged vocals, themes stated on guitar... yeah, well.  Three songs made the cut:  Lemon Yellow Black, Sea Anemone, Sweet Avenue

Ladytron - "604":  Club tracks.  Electronic music, a'la Kraftwerk or Daft Punk, except with hard-edged female vocals.  The whole thing is mixed treble-heavy, and when you add to that the female vocals, it seems a bit strident (like when a female politician starts revving it up from the podium - a little screechy.)  Might have helped to have more emphasis on bass and drum.  Still, there were a few tracks that were okay, two instrumentals (Mu-tron and Zmeyka), and three others (Jet Age, Playgirl, The Way That I Found You.)

Thom Yorke - "The Eraser":   Arghh.  A jarring record.   It feels like someone in the control booth is turning the vocal channel on & off, on & off, randomly.  Skipped beats are soooo disturbing, I just can't get past them.  :(  And I like the guy's voice perfectly well from his work with Radiohead; I mean, I'd just like to hear him sing!   Grrr.  Stop with the effects already!  No thumbs up; nothing made the playlist.  

John Gold - "The Eastside Shake":  Eh.  Not real compelling.  Pretty bass heavy, with a thin vocal that sounds like he's singing into a 60's style intercom, you know the kind: "Mr. Smith, your 2:00 is here."  "Thank you, Carol, send her in and... hold my calls."  Not the best for vocal quality.  But it does disguise flaws.  Lots of minor keys, pretty slow, and the songwriting is sometimes... just dumb.  A couple of tracks survived the cut: Idea99, and Mandarine.

Okay... more positive stuff up next.

Open your hands and close your eyes...

...and you will get a big surprise!

Remember doing that as a little kid?  Sometimes you didn't even have to say the last half.  The first part was a code phrase that we all understood.  We knew that we would find something good in our grubby little hands if we trusted the person, closed our eyes, emptied our hands and held them out.

I saw this (unattributed) quote the other day, and thought I'd share it here, without further comment.  Some of you already know this from personal experience, and the rest of you... probably will, someday:

"When God takes something from your grasp, 

He's not punishing you, 

but merely opening your hands 

to receive something better."

So... are you ready?  Trust.  Close.  Empty.  Open...

Story and Meta-story

This was the theme of BT501 last night.  The guest lecturer was one of the prof's doctoral students and research fellows.  He was ... oh ... 28?  Buzz cut, mod glasses, scruffy beard, dull colored camp shirt with tail hanging out, over khakis. 

Hm.  He seemed familiar somehow.

He talked with an "aw, shucks" kind of demeanor and said "okay" a lot (especially when he was collecting his thoughts, preparing to go on.)  I wondered if he was a representative example of the next generation of teachers coming up.  

Hm.

Anyway, he talked about story, and about modernism's suspicion of story as a means of communicating truth.  Most of the Bible is of the narrative genre, and most of narrative... is story.  

So modernism comes to the Bible with suspicion, simply because of the way it communicates.  It's not a work of scholarly history or science, not a research paper laden with fact and proof.  It's... story.  Story is not intellectually transformative.

Story resonates with Postmodernism, however.  Story is emotionally transformative, it's told from a frame of reference, has a context.  Story is subjective, and (to postmoderns) subjective... is the real deal.  What postmoderns object to, though, is authoritative story.  What defines them, in an academic sense, is a basic incredulity toward meta-narrative.  

To them, there is no overarching, unifying grand story that unites and frames all individual stories, within their community or across communities.  There is no objective truth (which such a meta-narrative would represent), since subjectivity trumps objectivity, and individuality trumps community. 

So instead postmodernism has many disconnected micro-narratives, none of which are authoritative or normative.  Postmoderns would never claim to have truth that is not only true for them, but true for others as well, not even within their own community.  Even the stories they tell (their own stories) are subjective, and can't be trusted to communicate truth.  They don't trust themselves or others.

Thus, while modernists distrust the Bible because it is story and not science, postmodernists relate well to the story, but not at all to its truth claims.

Hm.  Interesting discussion.

The lecturer also maintained that all genres of literature contain story to some degree.  "Even poetry has story", he said.

On the break I promptly went to the blackboard and offered this up:

narrative haiku

imagery with direction

pointing to a scene

I don't think anyone noticed.

Ready to come home

Extending a couple of days out here has been good. I'm caught up on my reading, got everything else done that I had wanted to, am pretty much bored now with all this sunshine and heat. :) Give me Fall!

Hopefully I get in tonight in time to make it to Hermeneutics class. Then one more day of vacation on Friday, to adjust back to Central time, grade the finals from Math 151, turn in grades, etc.

And then, hey! I have concerts coming up, too: Stereolab on Sunday night, Ben Kweller on Monday night.

This is shaping up to be a good month. :)

Okay, NWA, I'm packed & ready... fly me home!

Familiar faces, old guys, and pledges

Well, after a full day of seminars and breakout sessions, it's time for a little reflection. Yesterday I saw several familiar faces, though they didn't all see me. I admit that I avoided them, mostly. They were from various work experiences I've had over the years, with different companies in different cities, and ... NOT ONE of them reminded me of a happy time.

I really felt out of place here, similar to how I have felt during those times in the last year when I went into an office building. I would have rather been at a seminar that talked about teaching or about Biblical studies, or simply... back home. :(

I mean, it's lovely here - and I've had some opportunity to read, meditate, pray, think, see a movie (Appaloosa - great!), watch postseason baseball and a new HBO series (Trueblood - weird), as well as get some intellectual stimulation. But, it's painful to some degree to be among fellow professionals... in a profession I want to leave.

What was heartening, though, was to see old guys blazing trail! In this seminar on cutting-edge techniques in my profession, 5 of the first 6 speakers were over 50! It wasn't the young punks and new PhDs who were showing off their research. It was the old dogs who've been around forever, but haven't stopped thinking and growing.

True, some may have young PhDs in Math on their staffs to do some of the heavy lifting, but - they knew what they were talking about. You could see it by how they fielded questions. And more importantly, they knew how to make this research fit the real world. I was proud! :)

Made me think of Bucky Pizzarelli and that 7 string guitar from the prior post. No need to stop contributing post-50. There's a heck of a lot that can be taken from the world around you, blended with your experience, and shared back with the world - made better for your engagement with it.

Oh, and speaking of older stuff - a generation ago there was a tradition in this profession of mine. When we held our annual meeting and welcomed new members (always a special occasion), we all recited a pledge of professionalism. It was all about a commitment to integrity, honor, serving the public interest, etc.

We don't do that anymore.

And just this last year... two of our more senior members (one of them a household name to us)... were convicted of securities fraud. Maybe that's just a coincidence? Maybe not.

Anyway there was a piece on it in our professional journal sitting out on the literature tables here, and I noted this commentary on that pledge. I think the comments have application outside my profession. See if you agree:

"A pledge does not and cannot impose commitment. The spoken words of a pledge merely express [existing] commitment and affirm it. If the deep commitment does not already exist, then reciting a pledge full of empty words does, at best, no good at all. When the deep commitment does exist, then reciting the pledge on special occasions can be beneficial to both [those doing the pledging and those hearing the words]."

I think you could say the same for creeds, vows and promises of all sorts. If you don't mean them, don't say them. But if you mean them... even if you've said them before... it's good to say them again. And special occasions - are a great time for it. :)

mr42

That thou hast her, it is not all my grief,

And yet it may be said I loved her dearly;

That she hath thee, is of my wailing chief,

A loss in love that touches me more nearly.

Loving offenders, thus I will excuse ye:

Thou dost love her, because thou knowst I love her;

And for my sake even so doth she abuse me,

Suffering my friend for my sake to approve her.

If I lose thee, my loss is my love's gain,

And losing her, my friend hath found that loss;

Both find each other, and I lose both twain,

And both for my sake lay on me this cross:

But here's the joy; my friend and I are one;

Sweet flattery! then she loves but me alone. ----- Wm. Shakespeare, Sonnet #42

Shaped to fit what we love

Hi from California. :)

I'm here at a seminar, which sort of falls under the heading of an old dog trying to learn some new tricks. Generalized Linear Modeling to be precise.

Yeah. Fun.

Plus, no beach time for bonzo either. I have hermeneutics to read about. 200 pages worth before I get back.

Out here alone, I'm thinking back to last weekend, and remembered that I never posted anything about the great little concert we saw at the Dakota Jazz Club when we went out to celebrate D's birthday (finally my age again!)

Bucky Pizzarelli was in town, and he played his 7-string jazz guitar alongside Benny Green, who employed the grand piano to contribute his share.



These guys were two full generations apart in age. And, for never playing together before that gig, they made such music! The boy was clearly a student of history. And the old man WAS history!

It was so cool to see a kid in his 20s riffing with an oldster in his 70s. Bucky showed the kid a thing or two, besides. Man, could he play! And the kid was in awe... treated the senior musician with such respect and deference, even though the kid was the front man for the duo.



This is such a great club. Made you think of the kind of place Django Reinhart might have played in Paris in the 30s.

Like last time, I got a bucket of fries, which D and I shared (I had mine with béarnaise sauce, she with catsup), and each had a drink and a dessert. Mine was a draft Miller Lite and a dish of maple cornbread pudding - oof. So good.

One neat thing I noticed as I watched Bucky play: his hands, from 50 years of playing that particular guitar, had gotten a little bit deformed. I wondered how he could still do what he did - still play like lightning.



But the answer is that his hands weren't DEformed. They were CONformed; conformed to the instrument he had wrapped those hands around for 50 years. His hands conformed to what he held in them for so long, to that which he loved to hold, and from which he brought such music.

And I thought, what a privilege to hold something you love so much... for so long... that you conform to its shape. To the rest of the world, you may look deformed. But when you're holding that thing you love...

you look like you fit... just right.

mmhmm.

To Know and Be Known

With precious little time for it, but still trying to get a little reading done prior to class on Thursday, I got stuck on a particular quote from the author of my main hermeneutics text.

She likes to view Biblical texts as human communication, and posits this approach to interpretation:

"an interpersonal view of hermeneutics invites the analogy of friendship or relationship, whose goal is not completion for its own sake but continual longing to know and be known." -- Jeannine K. Brown, Scripture as Communication

I'd add to that a greater desire: to love and be loved.

And even better, to love those whom you are in the process of knowing, and to be loved by them, precisely because you are known.

It's like this quote by Victor Hugo, author of Les Miserables:

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved - loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves."

Hear, hear. Well put, Vic, old boy. I wish I could get that across more clearly. And learn it myself.

McCain or Obama...

... or neither?

Just read today in The Catholic Spirit (archdiocesan weekly paper) an excerpt from "Faithful Citizenship", the US Bishops pamphlet about Catholic Social Teaching and the electoral process.

This one was on human life and war, a wide ranging piece on issues from the death penalty to weapons of mass destruction to abortion to racism & genocide.

One excerpt from the document was quoted in an accompanying commentary, to wit:

That is why when the church urges us to vote, it notes: “a candidate’s position on a single issue that involves an intrinsic evil, such as support for legal abortion or the promotion of racism . . . may legitimately lead a voter to disqualify a candidate from receiving support.”

Well then... what's a voter to do this year?

McCain supports the destruction of embryos for stem cell research, an intrinsic moral evil according to the church. Obama supports the right to abortion, an intrinsic moral evil according to the church. And not just the Catholic church, either. Evangelicalism feels the same.

Oops. There went my choices.

I'm beginning to look at Bob Barr, the Libertarian Party candidate. He says government should take no position on abortion or stem cell research. One might call that a cop-out, but it would also have the effect of publicly de-funding each... while providing room for individual conscience to decide what's right.

Hm.

Music Reviews: Augustana, Old 97s, Ben Kweller, Travis, Dolly Parton

One last batch of what was in the queue here, before I review the CDs from my KC trip.  :)

Augustana - "Can't Love, Can't Hurt":  Reviewed one of their earlier CDs a while back (borrowed from J2), and liked it, so got on the list for the library to lend me their latest one.  The list for it was long, but it was worth the wait.  :) Sweet and Low is on the radio right now, getting lots of airplay. It's a great little tune, and it's representative of how this whole CD sounds.

These guys are people of faith, but this is not Contemporary Christian music. It's just good pop music, with a little crossover country feel. Other favorites: all of them. :) Especially Hey Now, I Still Ain't Over You, Dust, Twenty Years, Where Love Went Wrong. Really good.


Old 97s - "Drag It Up", "Blame It On Gravity": I had wanted to listen to these guys mostly because of Rhett Miller (reviewed previously), who is their front man. Generally speaking, I think I prefer Rhett as a solo act. But, it's still decent music. I'd call it alt-country.

Favorites: From "Drag" - Moonlight, Valium Waltz, Blinding Sheets of Rain, In The Satellite Rides a Star, Adelaide. From "Blame" - Dance With Me, No Baby I, Here's To The Halcyon, Color Of A Lonely Heart Is Blue, The One.


Ben Kweller - "Ben Kweller", "On My Way", "Sha Sha": When it comes to this artist, my buddy SQ is a fan(atic), and since we are going to go see him at The Varsity in October... I need to get up to speed. So he lent me his Kweller Kollection to review.  Naturally, since he likes Kweller, I want to like him, too. But (as I am with anyone's music that's recommended to me) I'll be objective, regardless. Mostly. :)

First off, what the heck is he?  Alternative?  anti-folk?  Pop?  Rock?  New Country?  Seems to vary song by song.  I like his voice well enough.  He's got the kind of light, clear, mellow voice like you'd hear from Travis, Aqualung, Maritime, etc.  He's just all over the board style-wise.  

Second, some of the lyrics grip you, others offend you, still others bore you.  I think he does mature through the three CDs reviewed here, each two years apart.  I like him progressively better as he gets more recent.  And is mellow stuff is more appealing than the harder stuff, I think.

Favorites:  From "Sha Sha" - Family Tree, Walk On Me, No Reason, Falling.  From "On My Way" - My Apartment, Living Life, Believer, Hear Me Out, Different But The Same.  From 'self-titled' - Until I Die, Run, Sundress, I Gotta Move, Penny On A Train Track, Magic, Red Eye.

Travis - "The Man Who", "The Boy With No Name":  The first one, from 1999, that I stumbled across in the library is less polished than the second, their most recent, but still good.  If you like Keane, you'll probably like Travis.  Plus, the lead singer sounds quite a bit like Rufus Wainwright, I think, with maybe a bit less expressiveness.  

Worth exploring if you're unfamiliar.  But I'd start with the earlier release - it had a few more successful singles.   Favorites:  from "The Man", Writing To Reach You, Driftwood, The Last Laugh of the Laughter, Turn, Why Does It Always Rain On Me?, Luv.  From "The Boy", Under The Moonlight, Selfish Jean, Big Chair, Out In Space, Colder, Sailing Away, Perfect Heaven Space.

Dolly Parton - "Little Sparrow": Oh, goodness. It's beautiful! :) This CD from 2001 (just deeply discounted on Amazonmp3) is soooo good. She sounds better than ever, and has made one of those rare CDs that is of one piece from start to finish, a cohesive whole. And she sounds modern, updated, but still classic. 

If you like Iron & Wine, Gillian Welch, Leigh Nash, but have never listened to Dolly - this is the CD to try. You'll want to hear more. Not one bad track, but I particularly liked the title track (and reprise) plus Shine, I Get A Kick Out Of You (yes, the Sinatra tune), and In the Sweet By and By (slowed way down and sung partly in Gaelic.)  Great!